Oasis Cay Islands
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Welcome to the Islands of Oasis Cay, an isolated group of islands with a growing Pokémon population.
 
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 secrets and disguises

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Holly




Posts : 63
Pokècoins : 62
Join date : 2018-03-23
Age : 24

secrets and disguises Empty
PostSubject: secrets and disguises   secrets and disguises EmptyMon Apr 23, 2018 4:59 am

Zoey often felt like she was always wearing a disguise. One she couldn't take off without exposing herself entirely to the world, including everything she didn't want them to see. No, that wasn't something she was ready for. Her disguises were an armor against the cold, hard, crushing reality. People could be incredibly awful, and she had no desire to be anyone's punching bag. Never again.

She wore her sunglasses to hide a part of herself she didn't want the world to see, to keep them from asking about the pieces of her history she wasn't ready to share. Disguise herself as someone else. Someone who was calm and confident in equal measure, who had pulled herself together. Sometimes that made her feel like she was living a lie, but it wasn't a thought that bothered her as much as it should. Maybe if she lived a lie long enough, it could be her reality.

When she was woken by a strange sound late at night and went to investigate, Lighter in his Poke Ball for once, she found herself face-to-face with her own reflection. Well, not exactly. She had almost mistaken the creature for a Pikachu when she realized that the head was somewhat crooked, and the smile seemed painted on. A... Mimikkyu?

She had actually laughed, then. Not the kind of laugh that meant anything was especially funny, but a quiet, bitter sound. Thanks, universe. A Mimikkyu. Of course, on the night she mused about such things, the Disguise Pokemon would appear.

After a moment, she sat on the grass. It shuffled slightly closer, and she began to speak, quietly. "I'm kind of like you," she whispered. "Wearing a disguise." It seemed to stare at her, perhaps with curiosity, and she tapped her sunglasses as a kind of explanation - still on her face, in the dead of the night. "Trying to become something worth caring about." Hesitantly, she reached out to touch its disguise, and it moved even closer.

Just talking to something that could listen but couldn't hurt her with words made her feel a little better, but a little worse as she started to dwell on her thoughts again. There were things she wanted and didn't want to say, at the same time. Things she wasn't ready to admit to herself, let alone anyone else. But something slipped out of her mouth without thinking. "Do you ever feel confused about yourself?" she asked, and half-expected an actual answer. "I spend so much time pretending to be someone else, and I think somewhere along the line I lost track of myself."

She made a sound, somewhere between a bitter laugh and choked-back sob. How pathetic. She was sitting cross-legged in a field of empty grass, whispering to a ghost, starting to break down. What a disgrace. That voice in her head, so familiar. Why wouldn't it leave? That part of her life was over and done with, so why couldn't she move past it already? Why wasn't she okay?

She was stronger than the thoughts in her head. Except... No, she wasn't. She wasn't strong enough at all. Not smart enough, not strong enough, not good enough. Never enough of anything. That was the problem, wasn't it? She was the problem. She was never enough, so she pretended she was someone else, anyone else.

She felt something nudge her hand, and was pulled out of her thoughts. The Mimikkyu seemed to realize she was upset - well, that was putting it lightly, really, but still. It seemed to realize she wasn't okay, and pressed itself against her hand. Absent-mindedly, she stroked the top of the disguise, receiving a sound that wasn't entirely unlike a distorted purr, if that purr was closer to a growl.

"Thank you," she whispered. "You've... Helped, I think. A little bit." Just talking, especially to a Pokemon, could only do so much. But she had admitted, out loud, to herself, something she had realized for a while, but hadn't wanted to. She didn't know who she was anymore. That was a whole, partially separate problem, and she would deal with it eventually. Maybe.

She wasn't crying anymore, anyway. That was an improvement.

In response, the Mimikkyu let out a cry. Lifting her head to the sky, she saw the stars just starting to fade, and the hint of a sunrise on the horizon. "I should... Go, I think. It'll be morning soon." As she stood to leave, however, the sound of shuffling followed her footsteps. Turning back, she looked at the ghost in disguise. "...You wanna come along? What's with these clingy ghosts?" she ventured aloud, the closest thing to clever she could think of. She reached into her bag. Sandwich, guitar pick... Poke Ball.

She tossed the Poke Ball without any real force, almost like she wanted to play catch with it, and while it would have missed its mark completely, the Mimikkyu moved forward to press the button with its tail. The Poke Ball shook for a moment, and another, and then fell still.

She looked to the sky once more, and she sun was starting to rise. As she walked in no particular direction, she thought that maybe her own future would start to look a little brighter sometime soon, but she kind of doubted it.
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